Its 12:06am, April 10th, the birthday icon on my ICQ has disappeared and I think the happy birthday messages will stop streaming in =p
I was wondering what's so special about today, I am sure if my icq info didn't have the little birthday cake, many would forget the significance of April the 9th. But I know leastone person who will never forget this day 24 years ago, my mom.

Last night my mom started recounting the pain,scratches and wounds she had to endure to give both to this 8.2lb baby that the doctor called "chubby legs." I think the harder part was providing for me for the past 24 years. She has made many sacrifice for our family, the deep pain and countless sorrows yet she is happy and grateful.
And I read and watch the news about war and sickness, I am reminded that each person has parents who loved them. I know it sounds very cliche but it really hit home for me when I experienced the death of a close relative. The emptiness when someone you love is no around, their voice no longer heard, no more familiar greetings of happy birthday. Really challenges me to see each person as "fearfully and wonderfully made by God" (psalms 139:14)

I'm 24 and I know need to start growing up, but its comforting to know that I can always return home and be taken care of =)

This morning, I read Psalms 117:24, "This is the day that the Lord has made, We will rejoice and be glad in it." I've sung this song many times as a kid, but never knew where it was from the bible. yes another reminder about gratitude and more from the book I am reading by Henri Nouwen:
Gratitude goes beyond the "mine" and "thine" and clains the truth that all of life is a pure gift. In the past I always thought of gratitude as a spontaneous response to the awareness of gifts recieved, but now i realize that gratitude is the explicit effort to acknowledge that all I am and have is given to me as a gift of love, a gift to be celebrated with joy. Gratitude as a discipline involves a conscious choice. I can choose to be grateful even when my emotions and feelings are still steeped in hurt and resentment. It is amazing how many occaisions present themselves in which I can choose gratitude instead of a complaint. I can choose to be grateful when I am criticizzed, when when my heart is steeped in bitterness. I can choose to speak about goodness and beauty, even when my inner eye still looks for someone to accuse or something to call ugly. There is always a choice between resentment and gratitude because GOd has appeared in my darkness, urged me to come home, and declared in a voice filled with affection: You are with me always, and all I have is yours.

Things I am thankful for today:
- God creating me!!
- family
- Gabe
- Uncle Ascot, Auntie Danny and Vida - you guys have helped our family tons! and good chocolate cake
- done prostho!
- friends to celebrate with

Verse(s) of the day:
- Psalms 117:24, "This is the day that the Lord has made, We will rejoice and be glad in it."
-For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,
I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Psalms 139: 14-15

I'm back.... Though I've never had one until now, I've had the habit of stalking people and waiting for them to update their blogs. When I finally figure out how to, I hope to add links =)

Rite now I'm in the science library at UT taking a study break, and yup checking people's blogs=p. One of my new favs is another classmates' "Life on 124 Edward Street."
He writes about things he notices around him and since we spend most of our time in the dental building, its usually dentally related. He's also in charge of the dents 0T5 webpage so I suggested putting links to people's blogs. His reply was that people see him everyday, don't think they would like to read his blog.. true.. Maybe I'm just strange, Jen and Andy have only had their blogs for a couple days and I think I jacked up their counter.... yes prostho is very boring...
I think I like to read their analyses and comments of the seemingly mundane life of a dental student.

Yesterday when I was ranting about my seemingly endless workload, my mom reminded me, your lucky to have a chance to write those exams. And indeed, at some point last summer I wasn't sure I would be able to return to dental school. In the past, I was really fortunate that my parents supported me both in spirit and finance to pursue whatever educational goals I wished. My dad worked his way through high school and university with 4 part time jobs, and believed that if he could he wanted his daughters to be able to try all that life had to offer. And with that freedom I've ventured from a convent school, to an international school, a liberal arts college, UT and now dents without ever having to worry about finances. In retrospect I know I was really extravagant in my educational choices and I was spoiled in that I never had to bear any of the costs. And last summer, with my father's sudden death, I was at a real lost. I really didn't know where to start.

Things have worked out though, and though I hear many complaints about the dent faculty, Donna Crossan (assistant dean) really helped me through this one. She totally understood and contacted the bank for me and guided me through the loans process. So as I'm sitting in the library watching the snow pile up (in April!!!) I'm reminded to be thankful as my mom puts it, that I have a chance to write these exams.

More things I'm thankful for today:
- people in dents, who help me get through the day but more importantly help me survive this year (hopefully until finals=p)
- for lunch time, all the laughs- an oasis in a days of endless lecture
- O -and another honorary Yuen sister, jas
- tough times - as my god father put it, now I have to learn how to manage money =p

Verse of the day:
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:3-5

So I've given in.. I've decided to start a blog.

Why today of all days?
I was actually thinking a lot about my father today. Yesterday was Ching Ming, a Chinese tradition for a day of remembrance. Not sure if anyone went to offer flowers to dad in HK, but dad ended up getting roses here. And just seeing his smiling pic, name plate from one of his first companies and flowers, brought back many memories. Guess I don't usually talk about dad, actually find it really hard to describe him, words don't seem to be enough, you had to know him.

Recently my mom's been thinking through alot of things and learning to be thankful for all that has happened to her and our family. Thankfulness seems to be a theme present in my circles, it came up in small group, a classmate blogged about it and the book I was just reading (Return of the Prodigal Son) had a whole chapter about it. Think I have celestial splinters in my head now. (learn about thankfulness...)
So as I come to write in this blog I will be reminded to share with all of you things I'm thankful about. Yes, this blog is more for me =)

Things I am thankful for today:
- a family who love me - a super understanding mom, supa-my listener, challenger and encourager, jams-super loving, tams- my little sister who constantly humbles me
- Gabe- thanks for listen to my rants and your encouragement
- friends - you guys rock! I thank God for you guys everyday!
- freedom to believe in the Lord - I was reading about Oman, a country in the middle east and the restrictions there.

Verse of the day:
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Phil 4:12-13

Oh and tlims stands for The Lord is my Shepherd, from Psalms 23